I learned two important lessons in the past 24 hours:

   1) It IS possible to burn Chex mix when making it in the microwave!

   2) Never, never, never EVER use a vacuum cleaner to pick up those teeny, almost microscopic beads used to stuff throw pillows! You'll spend hours trying to clean out the sweeper. Static guarantees Epic Failure!!

   This public service announcement brought to you by:

   Grandma Kitty

   You're welcome!

   I've been having fun reading a copy of the 1809 "Farmer's Almanack". Things were sure different 200 years ago, i can tell you that.

   It's interesting trying to read the text, since back then they used "f" as a substitute for the letter "s" everywhere except at the end of a word. For example, the word "business" was printed then as "bufinefs". Complicates things, doesn't it? It sure slows you down as you read!

   Another thing is the florid language. Everything is in superlatives; excessively convoluted, elaborate and overmuch. This isn't exclusive to the Almanack - that's the way everything was written back then, even newspaper articles.

   Last night i came across the entry for May of 1809, and got the heartiest laugh i've had in a long time. I'll leave out the "f" substitutions for your sakes. Read on, dear patrons:

   "This is one of the busiest months in the year with the farmer. And the farmer's wife; how pleasant it is to see her attentive to the cares of the kitchen, that something may be prepared for the 'mouth of the labourer'. See her hasten to meet her husband as he returns at night from the field. Careless of his dust, she takes him by the arm, and with tender concern and smiles of heavenly affection, supports him to his happy cottage. What happiness can exceed that of the farmer?"

   Oh, puh-LEEZE!!

   Your humble servant in amusement,

    Grandmakitty

   I did something this morning that i bet you didn't do! I raked the garage.

   Yep, you read that right. Last evening we had a small rainstorm with high winds that blew about two bushels of leaves into the garage through the slightly-opened back door. We have a yard full of hybrid poplar trees, which begin losing their leaves around the beginning of August - way before "normal" trees start dropping theirs. (Count on us to plant abnormal trees....) Thus, our back yard is already carpeted, and there are lots more to come. Anyhoo, i was amazed when i got up this morning to find enough leaves in the garage to kick through like you do on an Autumn roadside! So i got out the rake. It was way faster than sweeping... but i bet the neighbors thought "What the heck...??" Most people rake their yards. Me, i rake the garage.

   Remember me telling you about how i replaced the screen in the sliding glass door, and i was afraid someone would walk through it because now it's nearly invisible? I really was thinking about painting or cross-stitching some kind of design onto it to warn when it was closed, but hadn't yet decided which to do. Well, my sharp-eyed sister was browsing a gift shop, and found the perfect answer to my dilemma - a "Screen Saver". Ever hear of them? I never did! It's a small, two-sided magnetized metal thingie. You put one side on the inside of the screen, and one on the outside, and the magnets snap them together tightly. Wah-La! An instant design on the screen that can be placed at eye level so everyone knows the screen is closed. How cool is that?? It's one of those things that make you smack your forehead and think "Duh! How simple!! Why didn't I think of that?????" In my humble opinion, the guy who did is brilliant.

   So, my sister, being the sweetheart she is, bought me one and sent it to me. Here it is, both close up, and a bit farther away:

(Sorry this is so blurry - i thought i focused better...)

   Really nice, huh? She has such a good eye for style. Thanks, Joan!

   That's it for now. Happy Hump Day, ever'body!

   Grandma Kitty

   "Who is more foolish - a child afraid of the dark, or a man afraid of the light?" - Maurice Freehill